You know I have totally forgotten that there will (always) be celebration to welcome the New Year. Well, yes, one of the reasons being I never actually celebrated one, and I can't really see the joy of being another year older. I just realized it is new year when abang called me from his workplace wishing me a happy new year. Bye bye 2008.
Yes, 2008 has been another great year for me. Stressful, conflicts, tears, laughter, experiences and places, I quit my job, be independent by doing freelance, a new status from mom of one, I became a mom of two. Yes, a new baby boy.. it was all complete. And I can't be more thankful to Him for helping me going through everything patiently. The different perspectives in handling them somehow taught me maturity and control over myself. I'm glad.
Life's short. With the increase of age it would be shorter. And for many, with the increase of age, the number of things we wanna do before we die also increase. And as years pass by, we come to notice that time is ticking even faster than we imagine. And yes, everyday, we are running out of time. And yes again, my mind is quite troubled thinking of it.
Lately I have been thinking about problems. Well, they are not exactly heavy problems that I have to crack my head to think of solutions. They are everyday issues that I have to deal with. Unemployed, new family members, money management, relationships, conflicts, bills and the newest is moving out from my parents house. Hmm..maybe it is really heavy problems. Realize it or not, problems will never subside. Only that the complexity of the problems differ from one to another, and not necessarily the older we get, the easier we can solve or deal with the problems. Problems are just everywhere in life. It is how we view them and how we take proactive actions to make things okay. Woh, I am starting to speak like a motivator, duhh...
I think two biggest problem that hunting me recently is to find a job as soon as possible and the moving out thing. This whole job hunting is freaking me out! Money become lesser and lesser. After giving birth, I just couldn't manage my time to do my freelance job. Maybe it's a laziness or I just not interested to do freelance anymore. Enough staying at home. I need to go work in office. A year being a housewife was great, but still I need a fix income. Seriously I love staying at home. I can wake up late, no need to rush in the morning, no traffic jam, no pressure from boss..But, moving to new house needs a lot of RM for a small renovation, to buy furniture, to buy a small small things,etc.
I've never imagine I will leaving my parents house. Home that I live in almost 20 years? Moving out is just like a new experience. It's a big thing for me. I can't wait when it's time to pick wall colours, to do real renovation on our house and to buy furniture..Hahaha..I found out that shopping is one kind of theraphy method for me. Hehehe..To decorate your own house I find it an excitement since I'm an interior designer. Which is if I can't really make my own house at least 'sedap mata memandang', then I'm not qualified to be one. But then, money is always main thing. No money, no talk. No money, no bling bling for the house. Don't expect your house to look like a million dollar house when your bank account don't have even thousand dollar. That is why I need to be employed as soon as possible. Because I want my kids to live in a comfortable house just like my parents did to me. I'm excited to move out, but at the same time, I'm not that enthusiast to leave mak. Oh...I'm leaving you mak?
Ah,enough talking problems, new year means new problems. Hehehe... I don't know what's coming this 2009. But I hope for 2009, my family and I will have a blessing day,everyday. I hope very hard to join a good id firm and a good bargain salary..hehe.. (Oh God, please....help me..) and oh..oh..world peace.
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I never had a new year resolution. Maybe during school time I do have, but never intend to achieve it. I think a 'new year resolution' sounds flippant and cliche. Why not change it to 'My-Must-Do' or 'My-Must-Get' or 'My-Must-Be' or 'My-Must-Have'? Sound realistic to me. Ok, 'My-Must-Do-Get-Be-and-Have 2009' will be..
1. Must get a job real quick..and a good salary too..
2. Must be a good interior designer. To really grab opportunities to be one if I have a job later.
3. I have to improve my English. I must. Blogging helps me a lot and working with international company is an advantage. You'll speak English most of time if you working in english speaking environment. I pray I want to be hired by IDeeAss..Please...Ngee~
4. Must buy new car? Abang, can ah? Ngee~ Changing new car is not a main thing actually. It's about my dream when first I got my car license, is to get my favourite plate number ; WSU 187. Since now they already WSC. Hahaha.. Sound cliche,but I just want it very much. I guess I couldn't have it since I have no job and we are moving to new house. Hmm.. Not a good time right? Sigh~
5. I want to be a big heart person. I wish I am.
6. I must reduce sweet foods and beverages in my diet. This diabetic thing really piss me off. Grrr..
7. I want to be a good mother to precious Razi and Izzat, I want to be a good, patient, caring wife to my lovely husband, I want to be a good daughter to mak and abah and I wish to be a better Muslim.
~ s u h i d a ~
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